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22 September, 11.53am pdt
Be Dope Addresses Alarming Statistic

BE DOPE NEWS (BDN) The editors of Be Dope have issued a statement in response to a survey of BeOS users conducted by Omicronsoft.

According to the survey, when asked where they get their latest news from, a shockingly low 47% reported they got their news from Be Dope.

Clearly, this is unacceptable.

"It is good to know that almost half the BeOS community stays connected to the latest BeOS-related happening via Be Dope," I said in a prepared statement. "However, I fear for those BeOS users out there in a hostile world, who are not armed with the most up-to-date accurate information only Be Dope, with its vast network of reporters, inside agents and spy cameras, can provide."

In response to this crisis, Be Dope is launching an aggressive media campaign.

"In addition to our banner ads on The BeOS Tip Server and The Be Line, we've purchased primetime television commercials, to air on NBC during their 'Premiere Week' shows," I explained. "It strained our budget a bit, but we were able to purchase several 1-second subliminal advertisements."

Be Dope is also asking for help from the BeOS community itself.

"Any community in its earliest stages needs as much strength as possible to prosper," reads a Be Dope ad running in this month's Wired. "If you're a Be Dope reader, and know of a BeOS user who is not, please, tie them to their chair, read them the entire archives and make Be Dope their browser's start-up page. They will thank you for it."

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