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17 November, 5.35pm pst
Be Disarms NSA Plot

BE DOPE NEWS (BDN) A plot to disrupt the progress of Be, Inc. and the BeOS was narrowly averted today, saving thousands of lives in the progress.

The NSA (super-secrecy agency of the USA) has long been split on the subject of the BeOS. On the one hand, the power of the BeOS advanced their work by decades in the space of mere months. On the other hand, the same power was out there, just waiting to be tapped by the general public, thus going against the long-standing policy of the NSA to keep the general public as powerless as possible (for their own protection, and the good of the nation, of course).

Agents of the NSA planted several explosive charges in the press room where Be, Inc. is to hold its official press conference tomorrow morning. The charges were set to detonate once the decibel level in the room exceeded a certain threshold - a sure bet when you take into the account the thunderous applause generated when presenting the BeOS to the public.

According to an internal NSA email secured by Be Dope, the intent was to "cripple" the development of the BeOS by eliminating several engineers and key executives, including Be, Inc. CEO Jean-Louis Gassée.

Fortunately, the agents failed to notice the BeOS machine running silently on the corner of the stage. They further failed to notice the small camera attached to this machine. And they completely failed to notice that the machine was broadcasting images back to Be, Inc. headquarters via the BeOS CodyCam program.

Be employees back at Menlo Park alerted the Be staff at COMDEX, who stealthily disarmed the explosives and took them away for "further study and possible use".

The NSA refused comment, claiming that they did not even exist.


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