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13 June, 2000 2.45pm pdt | Go-Go Edition
Puppy Love?
sock puppet love is in the air

BE DOPE NEWS (BDN) Thousands of dogs converged on Golden Gate Park in San Francisco last weekend for "Dog Day Afternoon", a pet-centric shindig sponsored by Pets.com (naturally enough). Paws were shaken, butts sniffed, p-mail exchanged, but in the end only one lucky dog got to leave with the infamous Pets.com sock puppet mascot dog. None failed to recognize the lucky pup as Tracker, known world-wide as the hard-working mascot of BeOS.

According to witnesses, the dogs became inseperable after meeting in the giant pile of shoes. While many wished them success, some skeptics predicted the relationship will not last long.

"These actual-dog/sock puppet-dog relationships rarely go beyond the fling stage, and are in fact illegal in thirty-seven states," said one analyst. "Most usually the sock is found several days later, chewed up and tossed aside. Or the actual dog ends up with a bad case of sock burn. Either way, it's not pretty."

Analysts also fail to see any corporate synergy.

"What could come out of this? A Pets.com bookmark in BeIA appliances? A free BeOS Personal Edition bundled with every delivery of a squeaky latex hedgehog? Things just don't fit here."

Still, the couple has been in seclusion and unavailable to the press since Sunday evening. Rumor has it they are in the midst of a chewing spree in the vast Pets.com warehouse.

"We prefer to refer to it as 'intense product testing and research'," said a Pets.com spokesperson.

vline

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