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3 August, 1999 5.02pm pdt
Forget About Today's Story

BE DOPE NEWS (BDN) Seconds after the posting of today's original story, Be lawyers stormed into Be Dope headquarters and "strongly recommended" the story be removed.

The original story, filled with juicy tidbits, exclusive quotes and inside information on current deals obtained by highly anonymous informers was up on the site for less than a minute before the friendly visit began with a small explosion outside Be Dope World Headquarters.

"We keep a close eye on this site and always have a team at the ready," said armored Be, Inc. security personnel, who escorted the lawyers through the smoke and debris formerly known as Be Dope's lobby.

After a short conference, the editors saw the errors of their ways and quickly took down the story. The story you are now reading was placed on the site shortly thereafter.

"While we value freedom of the press we also respect the wishes of Be, Inc. that are conveyed by Apache combat helicopters," I said in a prepared statement.

According to the access log, only three readers accessed the original story. Those readers are urged to dismiss said story as a figment of their imagination, unlike the very real tank that will be visiting your homes shortly.

In unrelated news, Be Dope is proud to announce the addition of a slightly used Apache helicopter to its news gathering arsenal.

"Somebody left the keys in the ignition," I commented.


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